Why I absolutely ABHOR the phone
Dear Reader,
“Why not just ignore it?”
Crickets.
“Why not just wait until you finish lunch, honey “
Crickets.
“Oh God! Can’t you stop looking at the damn thing?”
And for those that don’t know what the heck I’m on about NOW — a bit of background.
We were having lunch together, and this was me talking to my wife … and the response to the last question … well, you got it! Hehe.
Woe betide the man that EVER tried to tell his wife something, even if he was or is RIGHT!
“Yeah, I know”, I smiled, swallowing the tart response that came to mind.
“I’m an idiot, of course, for mentioning it … “
And if there was ever ONE MORE reason as to why our kids are getting addicted to all the WRONG things these days, dumbphones being almost at the top of the list, this is one prime reason.
Set the wrong example, and guess what example your child will follow.
And really, for those of you that say “it might be urgent” — hear me out.
It ain’t a life or death matter by far.
We’re in times of the COVID lockdown, and being my wife does recruitment “on the side” … guess what is happening in that industry for MONTHS on end now.
Right.
You got it.
Nigh about NOTHING.
And while the usual time wasting and “calls for show”, and “conference calls” (UGH — I wrote about those time wasting calls on the blog before) go on and on and on, hey — can’t it wait until after lunch?
I mean, just how needy does one need to be to NOT answer the phone when one really does NOT want to (being the person my wife called didn’t call her back apparently, and is ignoring her?).
I rest my case, hehe.
Not many people can understand my “I only want the CREAM of the crop” customers philosophy anyway, and NO-ONE I have spoken to till date has been able to understand just why I hate the damn phone so much and how I run a biz successfully WITHOUT it.
Anyway, those that get it DO understand, but for the vast majority that don’t …
If there is ONE thing I absolutely ABHOR (and believe me, I don’t use the word lightly) it is the damned phone.
(I know. I had to say it again for added emphasis!)
Not so much just the dumbphone, as much as I hate to say it dumbphones have their uses too. Perhaps I should say the flip phones … or the LANDLINES.
I kinda like the old style phones though, where in you had to actually DIAL a number as opposed to “punch it in”, hehe. My grandfather had one of those on his desk, and if I had to use that (cranky old SOLID black piece if there was one) .. or what Alexander Graham Bell first invented, I’d probably do it … on occasion, is just for novelty.
But back to what I don’t like.
And why I’m saying it (you’re probably asking, but hang on, grasshopper. HANG ON!).
Most people are at a loss to understand my “caveman”, “wolf like” (actually in many ways Ajay was the only one that got it spot on to an extent, hehe) lifestyle.
Including my lovely six and a half year old who keeps saying “Papa, you’re NOT really a caveman! You’re just kidding!” (when I tell her I am).
And I AM kidding, but just in part.
As I sit here writing this in the middle of the afternoon, the sun is blazing outdoors, and I’ve pulled the curtains, and I am in pitch darkness.
The only light that is to come is coming from the computer screen.
And while cavemen make exceptions in terms of air conditioning (something this here caveman CANNOT live without, and obviously the keyboard and Internet) … the phone?
No way, Jose!
A long time ago, a friend of mine Michael had this to say about the phone (which at that point he insisted upon getting on, and it probably WAS necessary at that point).
“I don’t always like the phone either, Rahul . . . it takes away from my ability to use the KEYBOARD”
And again, while there are times (notably, while making sales, or clinching a deal that getting on the phone is required, and truth be told, Michael was clinching a DEAL) the phone IS required, those times are few and far in between and if the person gets it — there isn’t much of a need anyway at that point.
Yes, from an emotional standpoint it’s easier to sell on the phone in that we HEAR another person’s voice.
The “ring of truth” as my friend from the Marines told me cannot be ignored, and if you’re NOT a snake oil salesman (you’re already in the minority then!) … you will understand what I mean, and how this benefits you.
But even then, and far too often, phones and phone calls are nothing but a giant ENERGY drain and a BLACK hole as it were.
I cannot tell you the number of times I’ve got on the phone and felt my energy nigh on DRAIN out of me after (or even during the) phone call while the other person either “picks my brain” or “talks about something they want to” (while completely ignoring or NOT understanding the REVERSE).
Literally. And if you knew how people are wired to do this subconsciously i.e. prattle on at length about inane topics and the latest gossip, and Flakey-Book … and Twitty Twit Twat Twitter, and so forth … and expect YOU to listen to all of this while they drain their negativity unto YOU, thereby completely voiding you of precious energy YOU could use to complete your tasks and be productive in life or whatever, well, you understand what I mean!
Not to mention complaining.
And not to mention the vast bulk of people have no-one to actually chat with, or “lend a helping shoulder for them to cry on” so to speak.
And if I were to tell these people to look INWARDS for the guidance, guess what I would hear.
Crickets, of course!
Folks truly do underestimate the power of BEING THE ONLY ONE that CHEERS FOR YOU IN THE BLEACHERS when the entire world is doing anything BUT!
And while we all need a good rant and a shoulder to cry upon , all too often, I’ve noticed that this sort of thing is unproductive, and nothing but an energy drain.
Yours truly has been guilty of these too, albeit online. Many years ago I started a group named “Keeping it Real in China” … a group that was meant to dispel all the B.S. rumors out there about the country, and also to say it like is, which FAR too FEW people have the balls to do in the People’s Republic.
And as we invited people into the group we grew … NOT for the better.
One fine day, a friend of mine Alex, another one who loves these intellectual discussions made a comment.
“Im outta this group. It doesn’t serve the purpose Rahul created it for anymore!”
And though I couldn’t understand and perhaps did NOT agree with him at the time, he was RIGHT.
Spot on.
It had turned into a “rant” group more or less, with all sorts of inane bickering and rants and insults etc floating about.
Sound familiar? That’s about half the internet right there, hehe, folks with nothing better to do, and I soon QUIT the group, and handed over ownership to a person named … ah, but if you’ve read my last piece you know how he is. And what happened to it? Heard it turned into a porn group, no less . . .
Sigh.
Need I go on more about energy drains? This sort of thing is exactly what happens on the VAST bulk of the phone conversations I’ve been on (unless it’s business, because business wise, I make it a point to JETTISON those who act this way regardless of money or not).
Also, and as Freddie, a former boss of mine once told me (and as my Dad once quietly told me too)
“It’s fine to say it, but can you organize your thoughts enough to WRITE it down?”
My Dad and I rarely agree on ANYTHING, and are usually always at loggerheads, but amidst all the bickering, he sometimes did give me pearls of wisdom which yours truly has never forgotten, one of the other ones being “what is right is right, and what is wrong is just … WRONG”.
And of course, the brutal honesty which I’ve always been castigated for founds it’s roots there as well. I still remember the beating my father handed out at the age of 9 or so when I was in fourth grade and committed the almighty sin of not showing my “almanac” to my parents (because I was cutting up at school) and the bigger sin of (gasp!) hitting back when someone hit me, and literally almost fracturing the guy’s shin.
A guy way bigger than me. I’m NOT a big guy and never ever was for those that know me!
Not genetically gifted. Nothing of that nature.
Anyway, that brutal honesty STUCK with me all my life to the point my Dad later told me NOT to be that way.
Unfortunately yours truly was at the age of 35 back then, hehe, or thereabouts. LOL ….
Anyway, there are precious few things (other than the birth of a child perhaps or other such life and death situations) that cannot be put in WRITING and dealt with later, my friend.
And if the person involved doesn’t get back to you, well, so what.
What were they doing in your life anyway? What purpose did they serve?
Think about it, and then read what I said towards the end of my piece on “energy vampires” … and you’ll get what I mean.
The above should give you a FEW reasons as to why phones and phone calls are something I avoid to a T, in fact so much so that my phone is always on SILENT MODE. Hehe.
And as for business?
How the heck can I run a biz without the phone?
Well, it’s happened, my friend — hasn’t it?
You and I are sitting here on the Internet, aren’t we?
Customers are buying my products, and I’m providing support … or is that a fallacy too? Hehe.
And that, my friend is answer enough.
Last, but not least, this ain’t an attempt to convince the complainers, pissers and moaners, Mama’s boys and the like to ditch their social media and phones.
If gabbing away 19 to the 12 is your thing (when it doesn’t benefit you one damn bit), then go for it.
And in the meantime, us achievers will do our own thing, hehe.
OK, that’s it for now!
Best,
Rahul Mookerjee
P.S. — From a fitness standpoint, its far better to spend the time you spend bitching about “how you exercise, but never lose weight” by actually DOING THE THING …
P.S #2 — Or, by actually doing what you NEED to do to get better at the almighty PULL-up as opposed to just talk about it . . .
P.P.S — Or, but you get my drift!
P.P.S #2 — Amen!